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HOW MY FAVORITE SHIRT GOT BLOODY
by Tumbleweed Smith
I wore my favorite shirt to my Rotary club meeting last week. There was a sign on the door indicating this was the day for Rotarians to donate blood. I went to the blood donor room and rolled up the sleeves of my favorite shirt.
I have never seen a bigger needle. I have given blood many times and don't remember the needle being that big. When the guy poked that big needle in my arm, it hurt. And I let him know it hurt. He said he probably hit some type of nerve when he stuck the needle in my arm.
I filled up that sack with blood in about five minutes. That's because the needle poked a hole in my arm the size of a chinaberry.
After the blood letting, I rolled the sleeve of my favorite shirt down over the bandage they put over the big hole in my arm. It was just 12:30 and I decided to return to the Rotary meeting. For some reason the door leading into the Rotary room was stuck and I was rattling it trying to get in. Finally someone came across the room and let me in. I grabbed a plate and was going to eat lunch.
At the salad bowl I noticed the right sleeve of my favorite shirt was covered with blood. It was dark maroon. Blood was gushing out of my arm. I looked down at the side of my shirt and there was blood there, too, where I had rubbed my arm against it. Seeing my bloody shirt certainly got the attention of some people sitting in the rear of the room.
I put the plate down and walked out the door with the intention of driving home but decided to let the blood people take a look at the situation. The guy who had stuck the big needle in me said apparently when I rolled down my sleeve I dislodged the bandage they had put on my arm.
He put about a pint of peroxide on the sleeve and side of the shirt. It bubbled up and felt warm. It took out some of the blood. I drove home and my wife wasn't home. I am not the handiest man with a washing machine, so I put some water and dial soap in the bathroom sink and put my shirt in there. My pants waistband also had blood on it so I stuck the top of the pants in the sink, too.
I had a dental appointment at 1:30 and it was by now 1:05. I was hungry and weak. I went to my favorite burrito place and ordered two bean burritos. When I got the dentist I had flour tortilla stuck to my teeth, but he didn't seem to mind. I called my wife from the dental chair and she hadn't got home yet. I told her not to be shocked when she saw the bloody mess in the bathroom.
The peroxide and my wife's diligence with stain removers and a washing machine got my favorite shirt looking good as new. Now it has some character.
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